Therefore I advocate my rights.

Sometime the aches washes off, it's all supine for now and on, therefore I'm not defenceless in front of Indian Hindus or Buddhist and Israeli Jews, so-to-speak I love them all!

Venite Fideli 22 July-2013

July wasn't a perfect month for me and a lot of other people in Quebec would agree with me, nagging to just about the same issues: First off - the heat waves, then rain storms, the power-outage, the dreadful train derailment, the oil spills in Quebec and other parts of Canada killing a tremendous number of wildlife in Alberta.

The forest fires, the second rain storm and its floods, more power outage, the endless anti-Semite cyber attacks flooding my email in-box from totally unknown strangers... as much mail with hatred from people I've never heard of, never seen them, it almost made me feel like a famous politicians. Just imagine; and I'm not even Jewish. I was born from a huge white Christian family (not too religious) but at a very young age when I've asked too many questions during Catechism in school... I received harsh ruler beatings, especially when I've asked why shouldn't I frequent kids my age of other religions? “You don't question God” I was told with a shout.

I really liked to talk to Shabrema (she was Hindu) and Zoe was Jewish, they knew stuff from other countries to learn from. I wanted to know about India's jungles and Israel's Olive trees, but the Nuns didn't like that so they severely guided us to the right path versus the only Catholic God by force.

The Italian Franciscan Nuns used wooden rulers to beat me on the legs just beneath my knees (so that the hurt could keep me out of ballet classes) and occasionally they've beaten up my fingers and hands that kept me them inactive for many days, thus I couldn't write or create drawings. I never cried, I learned how to endure pain and never show affliction to anyone. My mental state -refusing to feel pain – somehow washed aches away faster than anyone else.

Up to this day I can fall and roll down two flights of stairs as it happened about a year ago, be totally bruised from toes to hip, immediately I stood up and walked off as if nothing happened and just continued to my intended direction to the chore, forgetting the startling trauma.

Then on; as young as nine or ten years old, I decided to become a closet godless-thinker, especially when I saw how the nuns have beaten up my younger sister Reina as well, just because she was left-handed and couldn't write with her right-hand, she was beaten on daily basis.

The Nuns constantly shamed her and called her evil-witch, (in Italian, Strega, it was her nickname at school) she howled so loud, I could hear her from down the school hall at least 8 classes away. I wanted to run out and somehow help her by comforting her, but I couldn't because of fear to be beaten up again and be deprived of going to ballet class or drawing time. Sometimes I felt selfish for not doing it, but I dreamt about it so many times, I planed strategic plots to how-to yank her out of the agonizing situation, endless number of times. However, like a coward I did nothing but freeze and stare outside the class-room window, let my mind float and listen to the crows that might have covered up her howling while the Nuns endlessly tortured her.

Reina; from a lovely spontaneous prankster at home, and choral singer at church became a fearful mouse. For Christmas we sung “O Venite Fideli” together as all the pupils at school did, she had a lovely angelic voice.

In time, I think to shed off being seen as the Strega, the evil-witch as the Nuns called her, something she was not, she embraced religion to the fullest just to please.


Religious scripture revealed
being left-handed as evil, and of course it was a lie as so many things written and read in the Bible but the Nuns believed it all and no one ought to question the dreaded scripture that instils fear into a child. I was a child, and I feared being demeaned too.

As time flew-by as fast as an eye-wink, Reina became an obedient religious junkie. She lost her beautiful voice due to her intense screaming that sometimes sounded like a howling wolf, being forced into a beating session was certainly a nightmare for her, everyone in my family knew it but nothing immediate was done.

Once, I tried to remind her of these days which she has altogether forgotten, she became very defensive showing off arbitrary Stockholm syndrome effects, accusing me of lying because according to her, the Nuns where Angels sent from heaven and God's servant. Oh certainly! Where have I heard that before, maybe in scary fairy tales whereas a real bad witch cast hideous spells?

Being stoic -I didn't mind that she hated me with a passion, because although the Nuns beat me up as well, I dared speak up no matter what the consequences were. I didn't change much growing up from a child into adulthood. I've always spoken up when something bothered me. Just as I do right now and in fact I might have attracted hate right into my email-box from an absolute hypocrite hiding behind an unknown surname on yahoo.

Now, where can I find a wand and some twinkling glitter to amend old warrior wounds that will never heal and keep Anti-Semite off me and my friend's route? But then again -I think I'm so lucky after all at least it's certainly not Noam Chomsky giving me a long lecture with every excuse in the book why terrorist clans have the right to over-take an ancient patch of land and therefore kill Jews, even though Arabs have 55 more countries to preach abhorrence and spread it willingly everywhere in the west as they please , just as they do at home in tribal civil wars constantly seen in the media-news updates.

Have I told you yet that I love you back as much as you do? Well then, I plead you to stop flagging my facebook images and posts for your own pleasure. I know it's in your nature to sting like a scorpion, but can't you just be a bit more wiser and passively a “Peace Slicker” as the Bible conveys? You sure call yourself activist, not? I think - maybe it must be because the oestrus summer days, it must get people so wild sometimes.

Nelly